tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post4595585094208240351..comments2024-03-20T07:22:57.464-04:00Comments on Cupid's Literary Connection: Bouncer Post #97CUPIDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01726782711068858241noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-26082881056396709322012-02-13T20:31:27.387-05:002012-02-13T20:31:27.387-05:00Before I even got to reading the query, I noted th...Before I even got to reading the query, I noted that the WC seems really high for MG--closer to the YA mark. The narrator does sound young so I don't think it's something you can just flip over by changing her age. <br /><br />However, I could be wrong. Kristin Nelson is currently doing a series about page length for YA/MG on her Pub rants blog if you want to consult an expert.Kimberlee Turleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04695299361596799423noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-86053204037236957742012-02-13T11:42:43.647-05:002012-02-13T11:42:43.647-05:00Thanks all! And the last paragraph of the query w...Thanks all! And the last paragraph of the query was an unfortunate typo. My email has a problem with adding too many additional spaces between paragraphs, so I had to clip into Word and cut and paste, and unfortunately that is what came up. I double checked my entry this morning when I saw the repeat (which I had triple checked, I thought, before posting) and it was there. So totally my fault. <br /><br />As for the character. It is not that she is too selfish, but more that she is frustrated and can, in her youth, only really assume that the grown ups have given up. She is just waking up to the realities of things being more grey than black and white. More explanation on that in the rest of the chapter. But I hear you.<br /><br />And thanks all for your comments!Davis Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15898606110282426292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-21622228773626030542012-02-13T11:01:21.836-05:002012-02-13T11:01:21.836-05:00I thought both the query and the first 250 were so...I thought both the query and the first 250 were solid. I would want to read more and I like the whole mixing of time periods. The only thing i did not like was her belief that no one cared anymore about the missing girl. That seems devoid of insight. BUt perhaps its age appropriate to a person of that age who truly believes they are the only one who cares about anything. People care but reality catches up with them. That would be my only criticism - if the narrator can't see that then she might be too selfish and self-absorbed for my taste.Happy Dolphinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-5832791869020704652012-02-13T11:00:05.773-05:002012-02-13T11:00:05.773-05:00I love the concept and enjoyed the first 250!
I ...I love the concept and enjoyed the first 250! <br /><br />I would only suggest that you remove the last paragraph of the query (since it is a repeat of the first paragraph) and trim it down a little further.<br /><br />Good luck!Carmenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01502915116446772081noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-90449557174960493352012-02-13T10:40:05.042-05:002012-02-13T10:40:05.042-05:00I'm so fascinated by this concept and the firs...I'm so fascinated by this concept and the first 250. All the best!MattBhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04506820747789092057noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-7730062491417663972012-02-13T06:16:12.853-05:002012-02-13T06:16:12.853-05:00Your query didn't grab me, but your first 250 ...Your query didn't grab me, but your first 250 did. (Having said that, I'm not at ALL the best judge of queries.) Autumn's thoughts/reactions seem authentic, and I connected with her immediately. Good luck!Meganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13297931478620077336noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-66136050844736641332012-02-13T03:03:42.529-05:002012-02-13T03:03:42.529-05:00Thank you!Thank you!Davis Johnsonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15898606110282426292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3349220550249399644.post-18082454516916948182012-02-13T01:31:05.633-05:002012-02-13T01:31:05.633-05:00I really like your first 250. I think you did a go...I really like your first 250. I think you did a good job of framing the events through the eyes of a girl on the brink of her teens. Well-written and heartbreaking. Good luck!Jenny Kaczorowskihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00289053983485597342noreply@blogger.com