Monday, July 16, 2012

That Awesome Day You Get to Hear from Ryan Gosling!

So you guys know Ryan Gosling, right (@GoslingLitAgent)? Yeah, that's his picture right there on the left. I'm positively sure everyone in publishing is already following this Twitter feed. But anyway, guess who somehow stumbled across an email from HIM to a CLIENT!!!! Seriously, you guys have got to read this! How awesome, and totally lucky, must this "Hey Girl" writer be? 

From: GoslingLitAgent
Sent: 10:31pm
Re: Your Manuscript Made Me Cry

Hey Girl,

I was sampling pasta when your email came. I had my shirt off; because it gets pretty hot in my kitchen. There was steam. I was thinking of you and decided to make a nice primavera, in case you came around and wanted some dinner later.

Just then my Gmail notification let me know you had sent me your manuscript.

A delightful kitten jumped on my shoulder then.

Me and Scribbles went over to my lap top. I had to close a few Word docs I had open, just some poetry I’ve been working on - no, you can’t read it. It’s not good enough yet. There were also a couple Chrome tabs on Habitat for Humanity. Summer’s nearly over and you know how I like to get my Habitat on in the warmer months.

I was so excited to read your book.

I decided to print it out, because I like to feel your words in my hands, you know? While the printer was going I did some push-ups with Scribbles nestled in my lower back. That kitten just loves chilling with me while I do push-ups, or yoga, or chop wood in my spacious back yard. Sometimes when I chop wood little songbirds will come over and squirrels and bunnies will just hang out. Those crazy guys.

So your manuscript was done printing and I poured myself a glass of Chardonnay and put on some Debussy. The pasta had a few minutes left so I started in on your first chapter. Tears slipping over the gentle yet firm contours of my man chest, I thought about how your dialog attributions have come such a long way. They are just the best. So few adverbs. I got so excited I did a bunch more push-ups.

Twelve rescue puppies rushed in then, and we just had the best time wrestling all over the floor.

Anyway, I plan to spend the rest of my night just sort of thoughtfully pacing my house with no shirt on while I read your manuscript, and sometimes crying a little. Occasionally the cat will jump on my shoulders, or I’ll cradle one of those adorable puppies in a way that lets you know I’d be a great dad. Later on I might go check on my sustainable vegetable garden.

But for now, I just wanted to send you this note and let you know:

Your writing completes me.

Let’s talk about submissions tomorrow. You can pop over after yoga, if you don’t mind sharing some Cold Stone Ice Cream on the couch. I like me some post-yoga Cold Stone.

Your Agent,
-Ryan Gosling

Whoa! What an email! 

Thank you Ryan Gosling for writing this amazingness and for letting me share it with everyone. Thank you! Thank you! 

(FYI: This is all just in good fun. Please do not take it too seriously.) :-)


  1. This is glorious. Thank you for starting my Monday with a smile. :D

  2. I replied on Twitter. But I'll reply here, too.
    This was hilarious.

    BEST LINE: "Tears slipping over the gentle yet firm contours of my man chest..."


    Tears are running down my face from reading this.

  3. I looove @goslinglitagent. Can I pretend I'm Hey Girl for the day?

  4. Baaaaaahahah. This just made my week. There is too much awesome in here for me to handle :D

  5. Um, yes. I needed this today. Love it!

  6. The two images of Ryan Gosling forever etched in my mind are:
    doing the Dirty Dancing lift in Crazy, Stupid, Love, and his one-shot scene driving the getaway car at the beginning of Drive. Two totally different movies, and he's excellent in both.

  7. I'm laughing in the cafeteria at work. Thanks for making my Monday even better

  8. ...I like to feel your words in my hands, you know?

    That's the best line I've read all week. And I've read some pretty damn tight novels!!

  9. Wow, I laughed out loud! Gotta share this one! :)

  10. Love. I think I have a new dream agent ;)

  11. Hahaha this is so awesome. What a great way to start my Monday!

  12. Died laughing. Thanks for this! Man chest. HA!

  13. Laughing and swooning at the same time. Oh, Ryan, you had me at Hey Girl.

  14. This is magical! Thanks for posting. hilarious!!

  15. LOL I love it! And I love Ryan Gosling Lit Agent! =) Hey, girl...

  16. Bahahaha, this was hilarious!!! Love it!! :D

  17. Could not keep a straight face! Lol.

  18. Awesome!!!! I <3333 this. I must go now and distribute the link forthwith to all my friends. *hearts in eyes*

  19. Replies
    1. P.S. I think this was my favourite line: "I decided to print it out, because I like to feel your words in my hands, you know?"

  20. Ha! I love it! Thanks for starting off my morning on this note!

  21. I'm caught in a weird juncture of swooning and laughing. Love it.

  22. Writer-In-TrainingJuly 18, 2012 at 3:02 PM

    Haha, I love this :) for some reason, I read it in The Old Spice Guy's voice. It was epic.

  23. Great voice, I could just hear Jacob in Crazy, Stupid, Love... but did I miss the submission guidelines?

  24. This was hilarious!
    Actually, I lurked your blog because I heard a rumor you did "something" which helped writers find CPs.
    I'm asking for a friend. Haha.
    Honestly, I do have a critique group plus extra helpers and beta readers on the side. What I'm really looking for is a resource to send people to for my blog. I'm writing what I hope will be a FUN top ten writing tips. Primarily for beginners, but as a reminder to the rest of us non-perfect beings.

    So my question is: do you do this? And, if so, can I link to you in my blog? (I can send the link to you after so you can check it out and scream at me if you don't like it)

    Ann Noser
    Here's today's entry (cute puppy alert)

    P.S. Confession: As I said, I lurked with a specific purpose, but Ryan Gosling distracted me. :.)