Monday, May 20, 2013

The Writer's Voice #3 - TWELVE STEPS (YA)

Title: TWELVE STEPS
Genre: YA Contemporary
Word Count: 70,000

Query:

Sixteen-year-old Andi is tired of being a second-class sibling. She could be better than her sister, Laina, if people gave her a chance. But when Andi’s crush asks her to fix him up with her sister, she decides to stop waiting. The only chances she’ll get are those she takes for herself.

Andi devises a twelve step program to wrangle the spotlight away from Laina and make it her own. Step one: admit she’s powerless over her perfect sister and her life really, really sucks. Step three: decide to love and support her sister, even when Laina totally doesn’t deserve it. Step seven: demand attention for more than just her shortcomings.

Second born does not mean second best. But auditioning for Cinderella lands her the part of the overlooked stepsister, a role she knows all too well. A stolen kiss from her crush ends in disaster. And turning her floundering biology grade into an A lands her butt in the principal’s office, even though she was definitely not cheating.

As Andi works through her twelve step program, she realizes the Prince isn’t as charming as she thought. And when Laina’s flawless fa├žade begins to crumble, the sisters work together to find a spotlight big enough for both to shine.


First 250:

There should be a support group for kids with perfect siblings. Something like AlaTeen, but without the drugs. We could sit around and talk about how our flawless family members are systematically destroying our lives.

“Hello, my name is Andrea Andersen, and I am a second-class sibling.” And if my sister weren’t so freakishly perfect, I wouldn’t be grounded.

I grab the last handful of hangers out of my closet and hurl the clothes onto the growing pile on my bed. It’s not like one little D in biology is going to ruin my life. And I totally could’ve convinced Mom to go easy on me if Laina hadn’t piped up with “maybe if you stopped skipping class, you wouldn’t be failing.”

Maybe if the entire school wasn’t obsessed with Laina, I wouldn’t need to take a break from class quite as often.

I throw my shoes, one by one, to the middle of my bedroom floor. I’m so not in the mood to sort through my clothes for Laina’s annual clothing drive.

I ignore a sharp knock on my door, but Mom opens it anyway. “Jarod’s here,” she says. “You can talk for ten minutes.”

I scramble to my feet, smoothing my clothes and yanking my hair into a loose bun.

Jarod’s here.

For me.

He’s never come to see me before. He’s usually only here to drool over the Princess of Perfection. But I’ve been grounded for nearly two weeks. Maybe he’s missed me.

19 comments:

  1. Woo, this looks AMAZING! Such a fun read, such a wonderful voice in your opening page! GO YOU!!

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  2. Love your premise! As a sister, I already connect with Andi. Great job!

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  3. SUPER COOL idea for the twelve step program! Clever! YAY!!! :)

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  4. I'm the oldest of three girls, boy can I relate! Awesome idea for a story, and the tweleve steps is too cute. Good luck!

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  5. Love it!! Can't wait to read the rest of it!

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  6. I love the concept and your opening page is just awesome. Best of luck!

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  7. This is great! I would love to read more. Best of luck.

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  8. The 12-step idea is great. I relate completely to Andi's plight and would love to read on.

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  9. Sounds like an amazingly powerful YA. Query is fantastic and your voice is so crisp in the 250. Love it, great job! Good luck!

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  10. "Second born does not mean second best." What a tag line! You definitely will have a huge audience, and the twelve-step program is so clever. Love this!

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  11. I absolutely adore 12 Steps, and here's hoping you feel all the love in the agent round! This story definitely deserves it! GOOD LUCK!!!

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  12. The query & 250 are really tight. I'm stoked that TWELVE STEPS made it in! [And great job, Team Cupid.] All the luck!

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  13. Awesome query and 250! Good luck!

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  14. Great premise. I loved the query and opening page.

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  15. Would love to see this. Thanks.

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  16. This entry was privately swiped by ninja Laura Bradford! Congrats!!

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  17. This entry was privately swiped by ninja Julia A. Weber!!! Congrats!!

    ReplyDelete