Sunday, February 5, 2012

Bouncer Post #26

Title: PLAYING WITH FIRE
Genre: YA Urban Fantasy
Word Count: 79,000

Query:

Seventeen-year-old Pollock Avery can steal anything for anyone.  Her electrokinesis allows her to short out security systems with a quick zap.  Since her parents’ murder, the money has kept her and her little sister out of the foster system.

A mysterious new client offers Pollock information about the murder in exchange for stealing exclusively for him.  But when she finds out he's the murderer and only wants the key to her ability, she manages to slip out of his grasp.  So he takes her sister instead.


Now Pollock must face the reality he'll kill her sister just like he did her parents...all to get the secret of her ability. Killing a murderer won't be easy as stealing, but her electrokinesis packs a shocking punch.

First 250:

The security guard’s heavy thud echoes on the stairs below us.  A static buzz fills the air as his radio clicks on. 

“This is SG9.  Robbery in progress at the James Anderson Museum.  Two female suspects headed for the roof.”

“Are you happy now?” I huff.  We burst through the roof access door and dash to the edge.  The scarf covering my mouth and nose muffles my voice.  “On my back, Rem.” 

My sister climbs on and digs her heels into my side.

“Careful, damn it.”  I pull my long ponytail over my shoulder so she won’t use it as reins.  The last time she did that I expected to be bald when we landed.  I imagine my body is a spring, picturing shiny metal coils squishing against one another.  My muscles contract.  Tension builds.

A deep breath and…release!

Together, Rem and I leap through the night sky.  I look back right as the guard runs onto the roof.  I don’t know if he saw us jump, but right now I need to focus on the landing.  Damn, I shot too far. 

Gritting my teeth, I try to pull back, but it’s too late.  We slam into a tall oak tree in the park a mile or so from the museum.  Sharp pain shoots through my left shoulder, twigs scratch my face.  Loud cracks of splitting wood cut through the silent park as Rem tumbles off my back and falls through the branches.  She better hold on to the backpack. 

8 comments:

  1. Ooh, that's exciting! Love the visualization!

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  2. This query totally called to me. I love the idea, I love the writing, and I totally want to read more. Good luck!

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  3. Thanks for your comments! Fingers crossed! : )

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  4. Pollock Avery love the name and the idea is intrigueing

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  5. Bouncer IheartbooksFebruary 6, 2012 at 5:43 PM

    Love the energy of these first pages. You're in!

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  6. Wow, thank you so much, Iheartbooks! I'm so excited!

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  7. Bouncer Bookish HandygirlFebruary 8, 2012 at 8:52 AM

    Wow! This is great! You're already in, but, well, in again! ;)

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    1. Thank you! I'm very flattered. (blushing while doing happy jig).

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